Jag saknar det så att det gör ont. Det är sanningen. Ingen får ta det fel dock, det skulle bara göra allt jobbigare än det redan är. Jag älskar alla här hemma, det har inte med det att göra, men saknaden värker ändå varje dag. Jag glömmer bort den ibland, spenderar några minuter i ett alternativt universum, för för att glömma bort det som gör ont innebär att glömma bort att jag ens har varit borta. Då känner jag hellre smärtan, för att glömma det bästa året i mitt liv, om så bara för några minuter, är inget jag vill. 

 

The hardest thing must be when I do something I got as a habit in America, I expect people to at least react. Hopefully comment with a "You're so weird Mimmi!", as I am so used and fond of hearing that now. Instead they behave like it is something I have always done. Then it is like the steps I took forward to find myself in America are slowly taken away from me again. That just hurts. 

 

Writing the word "that" makes me miss it more too... I worked so hard all year not to use it in essays, still it just sneaks in everywhere! 

 

I also miss English, it is so much easier to express yourself in this language. That's why I kind of swithched in the middle of this post, hope you don't mind. You'll hear more from me soon, gotta sleep to run in the morning. While I run I like to pretend that I'm back at home, that I just found a new interesting trail to follow. Soon about to meet Ursa in the driveway, trying to lick my legs. Walk in and find Maddie somewhere eating, join her, watch some series and movies. Eat, watch, talk, laugh, taking advantage of every moment I can spend with my sister.